not too short to save

Sometimes I have a hard time in prayer. Not that praying itself is hard, but sometimes it feels like the things I deal with are either way too massive in my head or feel incredibly small. I want to pray that I see the doors as God opens them and that I follow after the path that I know I have been called into, but it just feels so big and so unknown. It’s not specific, there’s not always a yes or no answer needed for clarity. Then, there are the little things, bumps in the road that happen daily, and there is always a moment of, “does God really care about the small stuff?”

Over the past year there have been massive prayers that many of us have had. Prayers over safety, healing of loved ones, and figuring out how to provide. There have also been small things that we deal with, that sometimes give us a guilt factor of wondering if compared to the pandemic, I should even be coming to God about this.

Continue reading

i will rejoice

Every so often I like to re-read the book of Habakkuk. I read it because often I find myself in the same place as Habakkuk, he was a prophet and watching the world around him fall into chaos. Habakkuk is watching an army invade the land of his people, and he starts to lose hope in what God is doing. He starts to lose faith in God.

I love this book because it is such a raw emotional place, and in that state, Habakkuk cries out to God in hopes of finding his faith in the midst of uncertainty. In my own life, I find that there are seasons of unknowns and growth, and in those moments, it becomes increasingly difficult to have faith that there is a plan in all of this. What I love about this scripture, is that Habakkuk turns to God in his struggle.

Feelings are okay. Talking to God about your feelings is okay. Being vulnerable with God, is the point of a relationship with God.

Continue reading

Faith (Full)

Welcome back to my blog! It’s been a couple of weeks, and that’s been due to a busy moment in life, starting a new batch of classes, settling into our new space, as well as battling my own mental health. Life is always in flux, moving and changing constantly, and many times we can adapt, but there will be moments where adapting breaks. We become unfamiliar with the new rhythms that show up, and often this leads to confusion and cloudy heads. I’m being a bit honest today, not in order to gain your sympathy, but to help you know that it’s okay to not be okay.

This season in particular has showed most people that life is in flux. I like to laugh with dear Danielle about how everything shutting down gave us a minute to breathe, because the majority of our marriage has been the art of shifting and changing with the new environments that present themselves in our lives. The goal of life is not to find the easiest route, it’s about growing and changing into who you are called to be.

Continue reading

Journey Update: The New Year & Loving More

This past year has been one of the busiest and chaotic years to date. As you might know, my monthly posting schedule has been completely thrown out during December. Working a theme park is fun, but working during the holidays and as a new ride opens, it started to become more like hell for a few weeks. Kind of a fitting way to end a chaotic year with a bit more chaos on top. I’ve learned to adapt very quick over this year. It began with me not having my main youth pastor job, and my dearest Danielle and I searching for what was next. With an open door and a need to push ourselves out of our comfort zone, we made the move down to Orlando for Danielle’s Disney College Program. While job searching, I found myself processing a lot of hurts, my pastoring position wasn’t just a job; I had invested in the lives of a ton of students, so when I was let go, I didn’t really know what to do.

I didn’t belong, and I felt like I was letting those students down or abandoning them.

It felt like my purpose was pulled away, I had gotten wrapped up in a place and lost sight that no matter where God had me, I had purpose.

Continue reading

The Power of Words

“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.”

Genesis 1:27

The past few weeks I’ve been writing to you about your self-worth. I’ve been writing because I feel like you needed to hear life giving words. You see, there is power in words. Words can build us up or tear us down, they possess so much potential but are rarely used to their full power. We are created by a God who spoke the universe into existence, one who sent his son to die on the cross for each of us, and while he was on the cross defeated death when he said, “It is finished.” Proverbs 18:21 says, “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” Our words are a powerful tool that we all wield. I think we need to reclaim this weapon. We have all felt the sting of what happens when others use this to hurt us, to tear our hearts open and cause so much pain. The past two weeks I have been writing about the fact that we are all made in the image of God, and we are so worth loving. We must believe this fact, we must believe that God created us for so much more. We are greater than what the world tries to say we are, we are made for a purpose. We are made to build up the kingdom, so we must use the power of our words to accomplish the mission.

Continue reading

My Beloved

“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.”

Genesis 1:27

I think one of the hardest things to feel is not being loved. So many times in our lives we try to earn the love of others. We try to have the people around us look up to us, think that we are important and relevant. Sometimes we try to earn the love from another person in a relationship, which can leave us empty and broken. Maybe you are trying to earn love from a parent who wanted nothing to do with you. You try to earn love in your job, hobbies, in most things you do. Why? Why do we do this to ourselves? We are creatures that were made for love, because our God is love. The thing is, we have become disconnected from God; we’ve lost our source of true love. This love is a deep love, one that enters into our life and breaks our heart, making us new creatures. We are searching for love in all the wrong places (that’s gotta be a song, right?). We are wanting love because we feel incomplete, and in our incompletion we feel the farthest thing from beautiful; we feel ugly. This is the lie Satan, the great deceiver, is speaking over us. The truth is, we follow a God who is all powerful and made us in his image. We have a God that calls us sinners, those who have chosen independence from him; he calls us his beloved.

Continue reading

Thank (Full)

“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

1 Thessalonians 5:18

This is a big year. My life at this time will look radically different from what it looks like now. I will be graduating and begin the search for jobs. I will be moving into new places and meeting new people. I will face new challenges and old hurts. I am very nervous about this next year. Last week I wrote about fears, I wrote about the reminders that I have to give to myself on a daily basis, because fear is the thing that tries to tear me down. I fear being a failure, I fear being rejected, and most of all I fear dying and having my life not have made an impact. I believe that God has made each one of us special and unique, capable of doing incredible things. Yet, I have seen people close to me take this fact for granted and run after their own desires. Our desires, our earthly desires, are meaningless. Sure making money to provide for your family is good and all, but why is that the focus of your life? There is so much more to life. You have so much more to give. I’m still one of those crazy people that believes I can change the world, I believe that you can change the world too. In a season of life where I feel afraid of the future and what it might bring, I choose to be thankful no matter what. I choose to be thankful, because I am full of thanks. In the midst of my fears and weakness I’m reminded about the things I have been blessed with, and in the midst of your own fears and weaknesses, you can be thank full too.

Continue reading

Guard Your Heart

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”

Proverbs 4:23

Everything we do; our actions, our words, our attitudes towards others all flow out of our heart. This month I’ve been going through b-movie tropes to help teach life lessons that I have learned from God’s word. Today I want to continue but with no direct example, because there is a trap that we all fall into and it is a serious one. In movies we see people make dumb choices, they go into the graveyard/basement/abandoned circus and get themselves into big trouble. In movies we yell at the screen and laugh as a poorly acted character gets into the trap that we all saw coming. The truth is, we are often that character. We walk into obvious traps and lies from our enemy, and it costs us a great deal. Maybe you went into a relationship that everyone said was a bad idea, or maybe those friends you have that don’t really change the way you act (riiiight), or maybe it was the under-the-table dealings in your job that no one would find out about. We walk right into these traps, and they stare us right in the face. We can easily blame God for not warning us, but the real issue is us. When we don’t have our hearts set on what really matters, we will fall into the traps of the enemy.

Continue reading

It’s Dangerous to Go Alone

Well, the season has finally come. Fall is here! That means sweaters and hoodies, new TV shows are back, my birthday (shouts out to October 7th, yo), and Halloween to kick off the holiday season. I love this time of the year, maybe it’s due to the break of the heat, or maybe it’s something else. I often get a sense of spiritual refreshment during this season, new ideas and new adventures to undertake. Last year I did a series that related to classic b-movie themes to celebrate the Halloween spirit and reveal spiritual truths in silly movies. I want to do the same this year, but I want to be more focused. You see, recently I have been feeling spiritual attack. The enemy has been throwing storms my way, and through some difficult decisions I’ve made, I’ve had to persevere through some hurtful words. I think we all experience this kind of attack, often it means we are moving in the direction that God is calling us towards. We have an enemy, a very real enemy, not just a little red devil we see in cartoons. His plan is to steal, kill, and destroy us; which makes it hard for us to pursue God when we are attacked. We need a plan, a battle plan, one that we can turn to in moments of spiritual attack. This month I want to have a series based on this, each week giving a new piece to the battle plan for your life. So join me as we create our plan of attack.

Continue reading

A Love Letter from Your Creator

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

-Psalm 139:13-14

This is a message from our creator. The one who formed every part of you, every hair on your head was created by him. Every detail, every part of you that you see as a flaw was formed in the hand of God. Every part of who you are was created outside of time, then brought into time. Ever thought that runs past your head came from the personality and free will you were designed with. The skills, the talents, the dreams, the will to press on; all designed by your creator. The one who gave you life, and sacrificed his son so that you may find hope in him. This is a love letter from your creator. The creator who holds the universe in his hands, who is outside of the concepts of time and reality as we know it, and the one who can do anything; he chose to make you. He says that you are beautiful, you are awesome, and you are his.

Continue reading